Breathe In The Air

  Time to clear up a few misconceptions that "enlightened" people have been tossing at me lately.

  Let's start with [in], shall we? First of all, I never claimed to be "such good friends" with Adam Zimmer. I know Adam from when he was in Stept On, and then got to know him a little better when he was in Wake Up Screaming. We get along, we talk every time he visits, so I'd say that puts us at least on the level. And yes, I pulled an oops when I added a few letters to his last name. That was totally my bad, I was going off of memory from a Phantom X business card we had at the bar, and we all know how good my memory is.

  Now, on to my former grudge with Matt Day. There were no threats made on me or the Ranch at all when I dropped my online grudge with him. I just dropped it because I got bored with it rather quickly. The last time [in] played at the Ave., I spoke to Matt, and totally buried the hatchet. It's much more fun to forgive, forget and move forward than it is to hold petty grudges like that. Matt and I both agree on that point, and resolved to just get along and party whenever we're around each other. Better deal than being all pissy, right? Right.

  By the way, Matt and Adam, the first shot of Jagermeister is on me Saturday, and I'll see you guys at the Labor Dayze bash in Clearfield!

  Now then, let's tackle the problem with Erina. Look. It's over. All of it. Just go and live your wonderful new life and do what I've been trying to do (but have been unable to thanks to you) - FORGET. You're not getting any money from me, Joey took care of that debt when he spit in my face. The picture isn't coming down, because you gave me permission to put it up long before Joey entered the picture in any major fashion. What you say on your blog? Meaningless. You're assumptions are asinine, and totally unfounded, based on who I was long ago, not who I am now.

  In short - Just go away.

  We now return to your regularly scheduled life...

Posted by Eric @ 4:20pm, 08-24-04

...And The Earth Was Last Night's Bed

  Well, scratch tonight. And for that matter, next Tuesday.

  So this is the way it goes. Hell, Erina is probably laughing somehow, even though she has no clue what's happened. Oh well. We all know how much she relishes in my misery.

  In a few days, though, I'll be back to my old self. On the other side of the coin, though, I don't think much will chage for some of us, one in particular.

  And that's what makes me sad... REALLY sad...

Posted by Eric @ 7:41pm, 08-23-04

Every Other Day Of The Week Is Fine...

  If you can guess what song that line is from, then you'll know a little bit about why I've been in such a good mood lately.

  Someone and I have this little trait in common. We tend to, when we're alone, think entirely too much. If there's something I've come to know rather well in the last five years, it's that sitting alone and thinking is never a good thing.

  Over the years, I've sat alone and thought about many things. For the year after "The Destroyer," I spent most of my time alone in my apartment, thinking about what went wrong with me and how the hell I was going to pick up the pieces and move forward. "The Creator" is another subject of thought, but only recently have I managed to remove that from my mind.

  The one thing I ponder most, though, is my immediate future. It's the only thing I can really plan for in any way. I can't get too far ahead of myself at this point, that'd be logistical suicide. But right now, things are alot brighter than they were at this time five years ago...

  One hell of alot brighter...

Posted by Eric @ 2:17pm, 08-20-04

Mmmmm. Honey Mustard...

  We came up with the idea for a billboard for the [avenue]'s wings, and here's the first finished concept. If this does make it to a billboard... Anyway, if you want to see the full size version, just click on the image (693K JPG) above. Mind you, it's quite large...

Posted by Eric @ 5:05pm, 08-19-04

Wingmeister J

  Mmmmmm, Honey Mustard....

Posted by Eric @ 3:17pm, 08-18-04

Waiting Like A Stalking Butler

  Big hello to Those Meddling Kids, who put on another great show at Electric Avenue last night. Chris, Bill, Travis and Greg are always fun to have around, and deffinately provide the rock for your party with style. Gotta say what's up to their road crew as well, there's no bunch better! You guys all rock, and THANK YOU CHRIS for FINALLY letting me do some Tool! The next project I get together, I owe you MUCH stage time...

  Again, I'd like to thank the Usual Suspects for not showing. And here I thought you liked to make me unhappy...

  Nope. It's not coming down, either.

  Got something kinda big in the works, and I have CatGirl26 to thank for it...

  Believe it or not, it's good to be Eric right now. Whodathunkit, eh, Verne?

Posted by Eric @ 1:15pm, 08-15-04

And If I Play The Same Three Chords...

  I was told that this entry was expected of me. So, here it is.

  The trouble here is, I really don't know what to say. Everything I could say here has either been said already, or won't be said until later on.

  Wow. This is the first time I've been held totally speechless.

  What I saw tonight, I shouldn't see at all. But instead, you decided to just do what you felt you had to do, and you didn't care if I was there for it. What I saw really hit me hard, too. Can't say it's something I'd like to see often, that's for sure...

  You're not alone, that I can promise you...

Posted by Eric @ 6:00am, 08-12-04

ShhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhA-dow Puppets

  The last 12 hours have been interesting, that's for sure. Started off nicely, ended up with what you see above. The latter I won't get in to, but I'm still worried...

  Anyway, tonight, Sank had a small get-together at his house here in town. He'd built a rather nice fire ring in his backyard, with a layer of stone down and a gould four layer brick ring surrounding a good sized pit. I guess people being totally anal can pay off sometimes, right Sank? Either way, the point is, it's a nice fire pit for the effort he put into it.

  Anywho, Paulie, Jenny, Candy and Hoss-ette came out to chill as well, and we had quite the time sitting out in the chilly evening air. I personally made three trips to the Snappy's across the street, and the Uni Mart next door once. Won't get into what I went to Uni Mart for, but trust me. It's worth a belly roller and a half.

  Good times had by all, sitting by a nice roaring fire, swapping stories of funny-ha-ha and unnecessarily critical, but still funny-ha-ha. Sank had a stick he'd found in Ocean City. Not one he bought, but actually found on the beach. Anyway, he was using it as a fire poker. Between himself and Jenny, they toasted half of it away. Now, Jenny's a pyro, or at least she gave us good reason to think so. But the real problem was Sank, who would just roll his eyes and hand her the stick anytime she wanted it.

  Friggin pyromaniacs anyhow... This stick lasted Sank 10 years, only to have a half life of about three hours tonight. Oh well. Burning the candle at both ends and all, I guess...

Posted by Eric @ 8:35am, 08-09-04

Some People's Kids...

  Holestly, it just has to be said. You know what I mean?

  Tonight: Old friends, mediocre tunes, and me, home early on a Saturday for the first time in a long time. Despite the appearance of some old high school friends (one of whom is a regular Ranch reader, hey hey Mike!), it was simply too boring for words. Band? Not that hot, though I do have to give them credit since thier sound guy walked out on them...

  I think tonight, I'll just get some extra stuff dome. Maybe work on my writing, eh? People have been on me about that for years...

Posted by Eric @ 12:23am, 08-08-04

Blog Wars - Return of the Indifference...

  Wow. You're more psychotic than I thought.

  This ends here, and it ends now. Your logic is skewed, severely. Where you get half of these delusions about what I write here on the Ranch, I don't know, nor do I much give a rat's ass. Your high and mighty attitude about everything sucks. And attacking Tiffany? Come ON! Tiffany is a good girl, and doesn't deserve whatever you have to offer. She's out of this.

  Who I am, what I do, is my own thing. Who you are, what you do, is yours. The two no longer interface with one another. My only regret? Allowing you to do as much damage to me as you did, and allowing myself to become what I became as a result. Other than that, problem solved.

  I'm not going to go off on a rant about you, Erina. You've proven what everyone told me from the beginning, and now you're just being annoying. So, here's what I want you to do.

  Take your happy life and live it. Away from me. Out of contact with me. Not even thinking about me. I put you behind me for good [last month]. As Tom would say, and as you're now fond of saying, "End Of." The issue is closed, Erina. Kaput. Finished. There's no more.

  And no. I don't owe you squat.

Posted by Eric @ 1:14pm, 08-06-04

Party Results

  The pictures from [july 24th] are up in the [galleries]! They feature Those Meddling Kids, who were performing at the Avenue that night, as well as many shots of the Yahoo Chat folk that came up to party with me, whom they know better as "Stewy."

  I want to thank TMK for putting on a killer show as always, and for letting me get up on stage with them for a tune. I'd also like to thank all the Yahoo folk who came up to party with "Stewy," you guys are the best, hopefully see you all at the November Shindig. And finally, I'd like to thank Eina and Joey for not showing up, ensuring that our night went off without a problem.

Posted by Eric @ 1:38pm, 08-05-04

KMFDM's Only Retracted, Remixed, And Re-Released Album...

  From [erina's blog], totally reprinted [without] permission, for obvious reasons...

  Excuse me? And just who are you to judge? What, you think that because we went through what we did, that you have the right to be hypercritical of me? Holy hell. You really do have some moxey, don't you.

  If you remember correctly, it was YOU who created the ASS version of me. That version of me is long since dead and buried, and I will never revert to that state EVER again.

  In a way, it sounds like you're scolding your child... Hardly. That child of yours died a long time ago...

  As for me thinking I'm the greatest? No. I KNOW I'm not the greatest. If you'ld just pay attention, you'ld find alot of my writing to be self-depreciating. Alot of my humor in person is self-deprecianting, ask anyone who spends any good amount of time with me. Me? The Greatest? Sorry, no. Not a thought that has crossed my mind.

  Everybody loves me, eh? Look. If this website isn't a testament to the fact that NOT EVERYBODY loves me, and some people HATE me, then I don't know what is. There's no way I'm going to let myself believe, let alone profess, such a gross perversion of the truth. Some people love me. That's all I need. Family, friends - what else does a human being need anyhow?

  I make no excuses for who I was, Erina. But I am not that person anyomre. You're the assface here, not me. That was completely unprovoked and WAY out of line. Up until Joey became "the perfect guy for you," you and I were doing so well, getting along, even hanging out at the fair one night. What made you turn?

  So I wrote about you in an [entry] last month. Bet you didn't read that one, since you were so busy getting your new life together. In case you didn't notice, I spent most of the entry detailing MY mistakes, MY bad/stupid decisions, and the things that were MY fault. I accepted a long time ago that the deterioration of our relationship was BOTH of our faults. All I could do was worry about my own, and fix them, which I did. And not once did I say anything negative about you, other than the obvious. I certainly didn't call you anything like Assface up until the previous paragraph, now, did I? Sorry. Don't think so...

  Since then, I like to think that I've become a better person, given the lessons I learned from my time with you and the evolution of who I was in the following years. I've latched on to my singing, because it makes people happy. Maybe not many, but the ones that are happy because of that gift are enough. I give of myself through my volunteering in the fire service, ready to jump at the sound of pager tones to help do the job that has to be done. I'm no hero, just one cog in a bigger machine. I do what I can, and that's all I can do.

  I've finally figured out who I am, and "assface" doesn't quite fit the bill. You? To me, you're history! I don't see the need to use your blog to rub your wonderful life in my face. I don't give a rat's ass about your life anymore, Erina. The only reason I link to or even read your blog is to see what cockneyed BS is going to come out of your mind next.

  Before I leave, know this: The title of this entry? That's what you are. I think you can figure it out.

  Do me this favor: Go live your happy fairytale life with Joey, and leave me to my own dealings. They don't, nor will they ever, involve you again. You're moving to Naples, FL? Go for it. I wish you the best of luck. As for me?

  All I want is for you to go away...

Posted by Eric @ 4:47am, 08-03-04

Un-Fair

  Oh joy. The Clearfield County Fair. Yay. The annual gathering of freaks, weirdos, rednecks, and a few cool people. A time for hawking NASCAR collectibles, listening to WAY too much Country music, and getting caught in the rain.

  And for me, a time to avoid exs.

  Why is it that my exs have this thing for moving to Clearfield? Granted, I dated alot of girls from there, but recently, it seems to be the "cool thing" for any girl who's had anything major to do with me wants to move there.

  Know what? Screw em all. In fact, I probably did. LOL But seriously, screw em. I'm too busy to be worried about the Fair, anyway. With work at the theatre and at the bar, and having to be at either one every night of the week, I really don't have the time, nor the desire, to go to the Fair...

  In the words of the immortal Gallagher: "Where do we all go to get ripped off? A place they call the Fair..."

Posted by Eric @ 10:30am, 08-02-04